Home of the POOP AND MORE
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Got an idea for a Poop?
If you have a cute poop story to add -send me the directions to your candy or food "poop" gift and the poem to attach.
send to me at: sandrasavonbiz@hotmail.com
Make sure you add --your name, email, and tell me to add it to the "poop" pages on the churchmouse website.
February:
Valentine's day Cupid Poop *
use small heart candies or red Tic-Tac mints (or jelly beans)
Place the candy in a small plastic bag and attach this poem:
Here is something from the Cupids above,
who fly along with all the doves.
Whose arrows have hit many lonely hearts,
they send you a gift for your heart.
Your kindness and love have been so true,
so the cupids have sent you their little poo-poo.
or this one:
I couldn't send you flowers
And candy wouldn't do,
Romantic cards just didn't say
The things I wanted to.
I got you something special
And here's the inside scoop;
It's very rare and magical:
A bag of Cupid Poop!
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This one isn't a poop, but it has the same general idea.
MAGIC CUPID DUST
Fill a small plastic bag with red and white glitter
On a pink piece of card stock print -
Toss a little pinch of Cupid Dust in the air when you need to feel some
magical sensations. It is a tiny sprinkling of love, fortune, and tenderness.
Trust in Cupid. You will never be alone and your life will be full of
happiness.
Hope your Valentine's Day Sparkles!
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Cupid poop
I think that Valentine's day is for lovelorn fools,
So I'm giving everyone samples of Cupid's stools!"
I did not seal this flap with spit,
'cause inside I put some Cupid S**t!"
Cupid poop
Just when you thought that Valentines Day,
had no space for any more improvement.
your doubts must all now fly away,
you've gotten a gift of Cupid's bowel movement!"
Cupid poop
front:A Valentine's Gift for You
On the Inside:Left: Entwined Hearts graphic of some sort
On the Inside:Right:This is a very special gift
That you can never see
The reason it's so special is
It's just for you, from me.
Whenever you are lonely
Or even feeling blue
You only have to hold this gift
And know I think of you.
You never can unwrap it
Please leave the ribbon tied
Just hold the box close to your heart
It's filled with love (poop) inside.
Cupid poop
Here is something from the cupids above
who fly along with all the doves
Who's arrows have hit many hearts,
who send you a gift in this lil' tart. --( heart) use either--
Your love and beauty have been so true,
The cupids have sent you their lil' poo-poo
Cupid poop
"I used not my tongue to seal this flap,
'Cause I've sent you Cupid Crap!"
My thoughts for you, I cannot tell with words,
But you get the message, from these Cupid Turds!"
On Valentine's day, just as the sun came out,
A commotion roused me to my stoop,
NO!, a FLAMING BAG?! I stomped it out,
Then found my shoe coated with Cupid Poop!"
Just when you thought that Valentine's Day,
had no space for any more improvement,
Your doubts must all now fly away,
You've gotten a gift of Cupid's bowel movement!"
I think that Valentine's day is for lovelorn fools,
So I'm giving everyone samples of Cupid's stools!"
I did not seal this flap with spit,
'cause inside I put some Cupid S**t!"
Cupid Poop
I didn't get you flowers,
and chocolates wouldn't do.
The sweet romantic cards weren't right !
Hmm.. what should I do?
So I found you something special
its been around since the start,
I found you something extremely rare,
tiny pieces of CUPID HEART!
Cupid Poop
I know how much you (care for)(love) me,
Just as I (care for)(love) you.
But because you (never)(seldom) show it,
All you get is Cupid Poo.
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Cupid # 1
(use small red heart candies or Tic-Tac mints)
Here is something from the cupids above,
who fly along with all of the doves.
Whose arrows have hit many lonely hearts,
they send you a gift for your heart.
Your kindness and love have been so true,
so the cupids have sent you their little poo-poo.
Cupid #2
I could have sent you flowers,
And candy would have been nice, too.
A mushy card would say the things
I really wanted it to.
But I decided to give you something special,
So, listen...here's the scoop...
I found you something really rare,
It's genuine Cupid Poop!
Valentine's Day - Cupid Poo Poo
If Cupid shoots his arrow,
and misses your heart by a few.
Don't worry, he'll leave something special,
His little Cupid red poo poo.
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Cupid Poop
I couldn't send you flowers
And candy wouldn't do
And mushy cards just didn't Say the things
I want them to.
So I got you something special
And here's the inside scoop
I found you something very rare Its genuine Cupid poop.
~~~~~
When cupid shoots his arrow
and misses your heart by a few
You don't have to worry
because he left his red Pooh-Pooh
~~~~~
As cupid shoots his arrow
and misses your heart by a few
He'll leave you something special
His Cupid Red Pooh-Pooh.
~~~~~
Here is something from the cupids above
who fly along with all the doves
Who's arrows have hit many hearts,
who send you a gift in this lil' tart. --( heart) use either--
Your love and beauty have been so true,
The cupids have sent you their lil' poo-poo
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March:
Leprechaun Poop
Put green jelly beans or the tic tac green mints in a baggie and attach this poem:
The Leprechauns of Ireland
Bring a special gift your way
Its full of love and happiness
On this fine St. Patrick's Day
And along with all good wishes
From this merry little group
Comes a little something special,
Its a bag of Leprechaun POOP.
or place a handful of Lucky Charms brand cereal some green jelly beans or some mints into a ziploc bag and attach this poem:
I spied a little leprechaun
Outside upon the lawn.
I hurried out to catch him
for I knew he'd soon be gone.
I tiptoed very quietly
Sprang toward him with a swoop.
He shook his fist and disappeared,
All but this pile of poop!
Leprechaun Poop
The luck of the Irish they carry along
And a pot of gold if you can hold them long.
But if you let them go too soon
Leprechaun poop will be your due!
~~~~~
So you're looking for the gold
Well listen here's the scoop
Those leprechauns all got away
But we found their lucky poop
~~~~~
The Leprechauns of Ireland
Bring a special gift your way
Its full of love and happiness
On this St. Patrick's Day
And along with all good wishes
From this merry little group
Comes a little something special
Its a bag of Leprechaun POOP
~~~~~
Tis a little bit of Ireland
That's been sent upon its way
To wish you luck and happiness
On this fine St. Patrick's Day
It's a wee and tiny present
From that merry little group
Tis the little folk of Ireland
Have left you their
Leprechaun POOP
St. Patrick's Day - Leprechaun Poop
(Use green Tic-Tac mints)
Note from Deb: in another group a lady saved the green wrapped Hershey Kisses from Christmas bags and used the red one's for Valentines -- what will-power!
It's time for the wearin' of the green
And the smallest people you've ever seen.
The luck of the Irish they carry along
And a pot of gold if you can hold them long.
But if you let them go too soon
Leprechaun poop will be your due!
Back to All the Poops
St. Patrick's Day - Leprechaun #2
If you're looking for a pot of gold,
Listen, here's the scoop.
Those little leprechauns got away,
But they left their lucky poop!
Leprechaun Kisses
(use green wrapped Hershey Kisses)
We couldn't find a Leprechaun,
or his cute little Mrs.
But we followed his rainbow
and found Leprechaun Kisses.
Leprechaun Kisses
Just a bit of Ireland
That I'm sending you today
To bring you luck and happiness
On this fine St. Patrick's Day
It's a wee and tiny present
Full of good luck and good wishes
Seems the little folk of Ireland
Have sent you some
Leprechaun Kisses.
APRIL Comics and POOP:
I don't know who took this picture...it says Happy Keester on the bottom of it...cute!
Bunny Poop
The Easter Bunny came last night
So listen, here's the scoop,
He left a special treat for you,
A bit of bunny poop!
~~~~~
Couldn't send you Easter eggs
And candy wouldn't do.
And mushy cards just didn't say
The things I want them to.
So I got you something special
and here's the inside scoop,
I found you something very rare.
It's genuine Bunny Poop!
~~~~~
Hippity Hop Hop, Hippity Hop Hop
No Chocolate or eggs for you.
Hippity Hop Hop, Hippity Hop Hop
All you get is lots of Bunny Poop.
~~~~~
Not good for you this year,
so this is what I say,
I won't be coming to your house,
not this Easter day.
So take your time and listen
I'll give you the inside scoop
open this card very carefully...
(In the center put this saying)
It's filled with genuine bunny poop.
~~~~~
Heard you've been naughty
So here's the scoop...
All you get is
Easter Bunny Poop
~~~~~
Here comes Peter Cottontail
Hoppin' down the bunny trail
Hippity Hoppity Easter's on it's way!
But Peter couldn't wait so long
He left you a bag of Bunny dung
Hope this helps you have a hoppy day
~~~~~
The Easter Bunny hopped around
and hid the eggs upon the ground.
Peek in your basket and you will be
amazed at what your eyes will see...
When that bunny flew the coop
he left you all this bunny poop!
BABY POOP:
When babies make a little gift,
A "treasure" you might say.
It wouldn't be the thing you'd want
To share on this day.
But these diapers are full of "babies",
Something you'll enjoy.
It doesn't matter if they're made
by a little girl or boy.
The "eternal flames" you leave for us,
Are always such a treat.
We thought this time we'd send them back...
Now isn't that just sweet?
JULY:
Firecracker Poop
(Use red licorice or red Tic Tac mints)
It's the birthday of the Red White & Blue
And I have a special gift for you!
With a flash and a Bang
And smoke that goes poof!
Here's your bag of firecracker poop!
October:
Ghost Poop poem:
I bet you'd like some candy
but listen, here's the scoop...
The only thing we're giving out
is bags of weird ghost poop!
Directions: Print poem above on orange card stock. Cut out into squares and place slip a poem into each mini ziplock bag. Squeeze out small dollops of hot glue on wax paper. Let dry. Peel off and place several inside each back. Add a safety pin.
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Pumpkin Poop:
Place a handful of candy corn or use black and orange jelly beans into a ziploc bag and attach this poem:
I started to carve a pumpkin
with my carving skive and scoop
But the pumpkin got so scared
He took a little poop.
It looked so cute and funny
Just like a candy treat
So I'm sharing it with you now
because you are so sweet! (Trick or Treat!)
Bat Poop
Furry Little bats,
They don't like cats.
They fly at night,
They are a sight.
They come and go by the moonlight.
So.....
Beware of where you step-
BAT POOP!
Halloween ~ Scarecrow or Ghost Poop
For scarecrow poop (or "droppings" if you prefer), you can use:
Malted milk balls, Raffia cut up in small pieces, M & M's, Reeses Pieces (great because they're Fall colors of brown, orange, yellow), or Candy Corn (same great Fall colors of brown, orange, yellow)
For ghost poop ~ what else but white mini-marshmallows (popcorn, white Tic-Tac mints, or any other small white candy)
Scarecrow (or Ghost) Poop ~ I
It's All Hallows Eve,
So listen, here's the scoop!
Whether you think it's a trick or a treat,
Here's some Scarecrow (Ghost) Poop!
Scarecrow (or Ghost) Poop ~ II
Fall is here...there's a nip in the air,
But you won't have to sink to despair!
To have a warm laugh…here's the scoop,
I'm giving you some Scarecrow (Ghost) poop!
Witch Poop
Witches are wenches,
who fly dusk to dawn ~
But better watch out
what they leave on your lawn!
Their brooms fly so fast ~
they dip and they swoop . . .
But if they get scared,
They leave Witch's Poop!
Pumpkin Poop
I started to carve a pumpkin
with my carving knife and scoop
But the pumpkin got so scared
He took a little poop!
It looked so cute and funny
Just like a candy treat
So I'm sharing it with you now
Because you are so sweet!
Ghost Poop
I hear that you've been playing tricks,
So listen, here's the scoop ...
I'm running short on candy treats,
So this year you get Ghost Poop!!
(great with little mini marshmallows)
Halloween is coming
fall is in the air.
The scarecrow is shivering
so you've got to beware!
The birds are flying a big loop-de-loop.
Look out!
You've stepped in Scarecrow Poop!
Scarecrows can be cute,
Scarecrows can be scary,
and though they move their feet alot,
they're only sedentary.
But if you leave them to their own,
and find them in the morn,
I'll bet you didn't know-
Scarecrows poop candy corn!
November:
Turkey Poop:
A silly treat for a grown-up. Take a handful of plain kidney beans, coffee bean, or black jelly beans and put in a ziploc bag and attach this note:
You invited me to dinner
with your family and your friends
You didn't say I was the main dish.
For me it was "The end!"
You frightened me so badly
I knew I had been duped.
So I left you with my calling card:
This bag of Turkey Poop!
December:
Christmas Mice poop:
On Christmas Eve as I was snug in my bed,
Guess what some little creatures were doing instead?
Little mice were making their stops
And of course they left their teeny-tiny plops.
And now this Christmas I present to you
This little bag of mice doo-doo!
Reindeer Poop:
Gourmet Reindeer Poop
1/2 cup butter
2 cups granulated sugar
1/2 cup milk
2 teaspoons cocoa
1/2 cup peanut butter
3 cups oatmeal -- not instant
1/2 cup chopped walnuts -- optional
Preparation:
Mix butter, sugar, milk and cocoa together in a large saucepan.
Bring to a boil, stirring constantly; boil for 1 minute.
Remove from heat and stir in remaining ingredients.
Drop by teaspoon full (larger or smaller as desired) onto wax paper and let harden.
They will set up in about 30-60 minutes.
These will keep for several days without refrigerating,
up to 2 weeks refrigerated and 2-3 months frozen.
I woke up with such a scare when I heard Santa call...
"Now dash away, dash away, dash away all!"
I ran to the lawn and in the snowy white drifts,
those nasty reindeer had left "little gifts".
I got an old shovel and started to scoop,
neat little piles of "Reindeer Poop!"
But to throw them away, seemed such a waste,
so I saved them, thinking-you might like a taste!
As I finished my task, which took quite awhile.
Old Santa, passed by and he sheepishly smiled.
And I heard him exclaim as he was in the sky...
"Well they're not potty trained, but at least they can fly!"
Santa poop:
Santa checked his list and then checked it twice he found out you hadn't been very mice since coal is expensive, here is the scoop he's giving you a stocking full of snowman poop. we also made some with reindeer poop, some idea except with choc. covered malt balls.
SNOWMAN SEEDS:
Cellophane bags tied with red, green, or blue ribbon- containing white cotton balls, pom-poms, or white packing material.
On attached message print :
"SNOWMAN SEEDS" (Perennials)
Directions :
1. Before first frost, plant snowpeople seeds in shallow ground.
2. Water generously.
NOTE: **Some assembly required **
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Snowman soup
The Soup:
1 package hot chocolate mix
3 Hershey Kisses
15 (or so) mini marshmallows
1 candy cane
Put the kisses and marshmallows in
colored plastic wrap. Then drop
the hot
cocoa, candy cane and plastic package
into a mug.
Add the poem below, this makes a cute
gift to friends in cold
climates.
The Poem:
Was told you've been real good this year
Always glad to hear it
With freezing weather drawing near
You'll need to warm the spirit
So here's a little Snowman Soup
Complete with stirring stick
Add hot water, sip it slow
It's sure to do the trick!
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A Gift Idea
Pinecone Poem
"Plant this where the lights will shine
Wish for tinsel and the scent of pine
Then close your eyes and dream of snow
And overnight a tree will grow
Or keep this token safe and dear
And you will have Christmas all year"
I took clear bags added pinecones and wrapped with pretty ribbons
and made this poem as the tag.
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Gingerbread Man
Run!! Run!! as fast as you can,
You can't catch me,
I'm the Gingerbread Man!
So I chased him all over,
up and down all around town,
While he was running,
and all I kept seeing was brown.
I never did catch him,
but I'll give you the scoop,
That brown that I saw?
That was his gingerbread man poop!
Penguin Poop
While visiting in the Artic
What do you think I found?
As I was walking on the snow and ice
This was laying on the ground.
I bagged it up and saved it;
Then someone told me the scoop
These brown little tidbits
Are genuine Penguin Poop
Elf Poop
The elves were so sick they couldn't make toys
And Santa had to fill all those stockings
He gathered the only thing the elves could make -
Here are your Elfin Droppings
Cow Seeds:
Start your own Herd. A wide mouth pint mason jar filled with Cow Seeds and raffia. Cute little saying telling how to plant them goes along with them.
COW SEEDS
HERD STARTER KIT
Directions on other side.
Start your own herd.
Plant the seeds in warm spot right side up. Cow will grow upside down if planted wrong.
Be patient, it takes a long tine to start your own herd.
For best results, MOO softly while watering.
PIG SEEDS:
These cute critters are made from a pint mason jar. Filled with straw and pig seeds.
Start your own herd.
Plant the seeds in a warm muddy spot right side up.
Pigs will grow upside down if planted wrong.
Be patient, it takes a long tine to start your own herd.
For best results, Oink softly while watering.
MOOSE POOP:
Kris Moose just left,
you heard me right.
Just packed his bags
and left my sight.
But with some luck
upon the ground,
there will be evidence
to be found.
Birthday poop:
Birthday Poop
The Birthday Fairy came by last night,
so listen here's the scoop.
When I got up and turned on the light,
I found all she left you was this Birthday Poop!
******